Welcome back to the Big Ass List of Family Traditions. Today we have the big one. Thanksgiving and Halloween are well and good, but this is Christmas, the merriest damn holiday in all the land. Children frolic over snow laden fields. Lines to see Santa stretch through shopping mall corridors. Mariah Carey’s Christmas album plays on repeat over bluetooth speakers. Christmas cookies! By God, christmas cookies are in the oven as we speak! Soon to be packaged in decorative tins and delivered by your favorite grandma. Are there haystacks in that tin? You bet there are haystacks. Will you eat the whole lot then hide your shame under 4 layers of outerwear? You know you will. Christmas transforms the otherwise cold and miserable month of December into 31 straight days of holiday cheer. So follow me, and let’s run through the most festive list of family traditions yet.

25. Get an Advent Calendar

What’s the best way to spread holiday cheer across all of December? An Advent calendar, a calendar used to countdown the days until Christmas. Each day you open a door to reveal a little surprise. There are a few options:

a. The Secret Door Calendar

Open each door to reveal a festive picture.

b. The Stale Chocolate Calendar

Open each door to reveal a festive piece of stale chocolate.

c. The Surprise Christmas Activity Calendar

I bought this Advent calendar against my better judgement and against my wife’s wishes. But I have an idea. Next year, when our daughter is one year older, I’m going to stuff it full of activities. Weekday activites will be something simple like ‘read The Polar Express’ or ‘watch The Grinch’. Weekend activities will be more involved like ‘decorate the tree’ or ‘build a snowman’. The girl is gonna love it. She better.

d. The Christmas Book Calendar

Wrap and number books, and read one each night.

24. Read Christmas Books

Here are Amazon’s 5 bestselling children’s Christmas books.

The Night Before Christmas

Christmas in the Manger

Little Blue Truck’s Christmas

How the Grinch Stole Christmas!

The Polar Express

23. Watch a Movie

And the 5 bestselling movies.

A Christmas Story

The Original Christmas Classics Gift Set

Elf

The Polar Express

Christmas Vacation

22. Decorate

Not sure where to start? Here’s a beginner’s checklist:

a. Hang Lights Outside

b. Get a Tree

c. Hang Stockings

d. Hang Garland on the Banisters

e. Get a Wreath for the Front Door

21. Take a Pic With Santa

Wanna know what $23 and 90 mins in line gets you? 2 4x6s, 2 crying kids and one Santa who, try as he might, can’t hide the fact that he’d rather be anywhere else on earth. Look closely, and you’ll also notice the quality of this image is shit. This is because the digital download was an additional $10, so I had to scan the physical print like it’s 2005. You listen to me, you bastards: for $23 and my entire Saturday morning, I should be able to relive this nightmare in digital form if I so desire.

20. Write a Letter to Santa

So you wanna tell Santa what you want for Christmas, kid? Here’s a sheet of computer paper and a forever stamp. No, we’re not going to the mall.

19. Build a Snowman

18. Go Sledding

17. Have a Snowball Fight

16. Bake Christmas Cookies

15. Send Christmas Cards

Every year I want a North Pole themed Christmas card where we dress the girl as Santa and the dog as Rudolph and it turns out super awesome and everyone loves it. And every year my wife overrules me with some family collage where I unfailingly end up looking like a dope. Example 1a:

14. See a Play

13. Look at Christmas Lights

12. Craft

Christmas crafts are the best crafts. Here are 3 you’ll remember from grade school:

• Paper snowflakes
• Countdown chain
• Cotton ball Santa

11. Build a Gingerbread House

10. Drink Eggnog

9. Drink Hot Chocolate

8. Drink a Drink

7. Donate Toys

6. Have a Fire

5. Listen to Christmas Music

Here’s a link to Mariah Carey’s Christmas Pandora, you know, just in case.

4. Wrap Presents

3. Exchange Gifts

Nobody wants a Santa-sized shopping list. So instead of burning 2 month’s salary on presents for your entire extended family, simplify shopping with a gift exchange. Here are some ideas:

Draw Names

1. Write your Christmas list on a sheet of paper, and put your name on it.
2. Put the lists in a hat.
3. Draw a list, and buy for that person.
4. Receive a gift from whoever drew your name.

Secret Santa

1. Write your Christmas list on a sheet of paper, and put your name on it.
2. Put the lists in a hat.
3. Draw a list, and buy for that person. Keep it a secret.
4. Receive a gift from whoever drew your name.

Doubles

Full disclosure: I don’t know what this game is actually called. But I do know it’s fun. I played it last year and it created an atmosphere of competitiveness and greed usually absent from Christmas gatherings.

1. Everyone brings a wrapped gift.
2. Sit in a circle with the gifts in the middle.
3. Select an order, youngest to oldest or whatever, and one person at a time, select a gift and open it.
4. Once the gifts are open and everyones has one, set a timer for 10 minutes and take turns rolling a pair of dice.
5. If you roll doubles, you can swap gifts with anyone you choose.
6. When the timer is up, the gift you have is the gift you get.

White Elephant

1. Everyone brings a wrapped gift.
2. Sit in a circle with the gifts in the middle.
3. Select an order.
4. Whoever goes first unwraps a gift.
5. Whoever goes next can either choose a gift from the pile or steal the unwrapped gift from the first person. If the gift is stolen, person 1 must unwrap a new gift.
6. When subsequent players go, they can choose to unwrap a new gift or steal one from someone else.
   • A gift can only be stolen once during a turn. A new turn begins every time an additional gift is unwrapped.
   • The game ends once the last gift has been unwrapped.

2. Leave Cookies and Milk for Santa

1. Play Santa Clause

When I was a kid, our gifts from Santa were never wrapped. They were laid out, like each pile of presents was its own toy store window display. The year Santa brought the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles sewer, the official headquarters for the Ninja Turtles action figures, that puppy arrived assembled, ready for me to play with as I piddled my PJs in a fit of uncontainable excitement. There is nothing like the raw, uncut joy of a child who believes some magic man just slid down the chimney and left a load of gifts. That type of happiness doesn’t exist in adulthood. But as a parent, playing Santa Clause might be the closest thing.

Merry Christmas, everyone!

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Hello and welcome to the Thanksgiving installment of The Big Ass List of Family Traditions. If you’re looking for the Halloween edition, you can find it here. If you’re wondering why tradition is important in the first place, that’s right here.

BUT if you’re looking to baste your Turkey Day with family fun, then look no further because we got the juice right here! Do we have pumpkin pie shots on this year’s list? You bet your cranberry-lovin ass we got pumpkin pie shots! So let’s get to it and see what’s what.

Thanksgiving Morning

There are two schools of thought regarding Thanksgiving morning. You either A) get active, in an attempt to compensate for an afternoon of gluttony, or B) fully embrace inactivity and begin the day on the couch. Which is better? We’ll cover both and let you decide.

Drink Coffee and Baileys

It’s a national holiday, which means my home bar opens the moment my eyes do.

Run the Turkey Trot

Last year my family ran the Turkey Trot, St. Paul’s annual 5k. How was it? No idea. I stayed home to drink baileys and…

Watch the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade

Did you know the first parade was held in 1924? That’s like 100 years ago. Now that’s a tradition!

Play Turkey Bowl Football

Not a fan of organized running but still want to get the blood pumping? Then how about some touch football?

True story: The last time I played backyard football, I was so sore the next morning, I literally couldn’t get out of bed. It was like every muscle below my waist had been torn from its connective tissue and then torn in half. This is what happens when you don’t run for 5 years and then one day sprint for 3 hours straight without any kind of warm up. Anyway, now I prefer to…

Watch Football

A day full of football is one of my favorite things about Thanksgiving; however, the Vikings play this year, so that sentiment will likely change.

The Meal

As a kid, I didn’t care for Thanksgiving. Without presents or pillowcases of candy, Turkey Day paled in comparison to its neighboring holidays. But as an adult, a weekday off of work spent eating and drinking like a medieval lord is the best present I could ask for. So with that being said, the following traditions are designed to keep the kids entertained while simultaneously allowing the adults to enjoy a well-deserved break.

Let the Kids Help With Dinner

Like with croissants. Croissants are easy. They’re pre-cut and you get to pop the dough tube. That’s always fun.

Establish a Kid’s Table

Confining kids to their own table spares me from a dinner spent listening to little Sally piss and moan about how Tommy Jr. wiped a boogie on her American Girl doll, and it saves the kids from hearing me curse openly about how the Vikings ruined Thanksgiving. Kid’s table. Adult’s table. Everyone wins. Of course, the challenge will be to keep the kids at said table. So here are some tips to do that.

Crafts. Provide construction paper and markers so the kids can design their own place settings. Then buy some fabric markers and a blank tablecloth and let them decorate that. Those two things combined should keep them busy for an entire 6 or 7 minutes.

Provide exclusive serving plates, so the kids can’t go running to the adult table anytime they want more food. Also, by giving them their own serving ware, they’ll practice table manners, passing and asking for things to be passed…I see no way this ends poorly.

Serve specialty drinks. Serving Kiddie Cocktails and/or warm apple cider will make their dinner feel fancy and exclusive. As for the adult table, take that cider and…

Add Some Bourbon

Here is a delicious bourbon cider cocktail recipe:

Ingredients 

• 3 ounces Four Roses Small Batch Bourbon (or other bourbon)
• 1.5 ounces cider
• 1.5 ounces ginger beer
• cinnamon stick for garnish

Instructions

1. Combine bourbon, cider and ginger beer into a cocktail shaker filled with ice.
2. Stir.
3. Strain into a glass filled with ice.
4. Garnish with a cinnamon stick.

Take a Pumpkin Pie Shot

The best thing about these shots is that I get to catch a quick buzz and disguise it as a fun, little tradition.

Ingredients 

• 1/2 ounce Baileys (or other Irish Creme)
• 1/2 ounce Dissarono (or other amaretto liqueur)
• 1/4 ounce Goldschläger (or other cinnamon schnapps)

Instructions

1. Combine ingredients in a shot glass.
2. To make a dozen, combine 6 ounces Baileys, 6 ounces Dissarono and 3 ounces Goldschläger into a small pitcher and chill.

Wear Sweatpants

For years I’ve tried to make sweatpants a tradition. I’ve lead by example. I’ve broke barriers! It has not caught on. Please, can we make this a thing?

Break the Wishbone

The key to the wishbone is to let your opponent do the work. Grab the bone as close to the ‘V’ as possible and don’t move. As he pulls, the breaking point will shift to his side and SNAP! May your many wishes come true.

Giving Thanks Traditions

According to Wikipedia, half of the Pilgrims who arrived on the Mayflower died before the first Thanksgiving. Half! Christ, the inaugural Thanksgiving must have been a bummer. Anyway, let this be a reminder to those of us effortlessly existing in modern day America: We have a lot to be thankful for. Here are some traditions to help express gratitude this Thanksgiving.

Say Grace

This doesn’t have to be some holy sacrament. You can even make it a toast. Just express thanks for the food and the people there to share it.

Create a Thanksgiving Journal

Establish and maintain a notebook or Google Doc, and every year, let each family member write 1-3 things they’re thankful for.

Create a Thanksgiving Tablecloth

Same idea as the journal only you write on a tablecloth. A fabric marker won’t come out in the wash, allowing new items to be added every year.

I know gratitude can seem weird and awkward, but consciously giving thanks has its benefits, including improved physical and psychological health and increased levels of overall happiness.

After Dinner

The precise moment when the holiday season shifts from Thanksgiving to Christmas is heavily debated. Protectors of Thanksgiving insist Turkey day gets not only Thursday but all of the following weekend, while Christmas Maniacs just say screw it and hang stockings the day after Halloween. But both groups are wrong.

Thanksgiving ends when the meal is over. That is the purpose of the holiday and with that purpose having been met, it is officially acceptable to incorporate Christmas into your Thanksgiving Eve. Here are some post-dinner Thanksgiving traditions, with a few preliminary Christmas ideas included as well.

Take a Walk

Already feeling guilty about how much you ate? A walk can help regulate blood sugar and aid in digestion, which means more room for pie.

Play a Game

In addition to the classic board games, a round or two of charades or Pictionary would be interesting with 10 people full of Pumpkin Pie shots.

Draw Names for Secret Santa

Please don’t get weird Uncle Albert this year. Please anyone but him…DAMMIT!

Browse the Black Friday Ads

The only thing more intolerable than Black Friday is passing up all them sweet deals.

Make Your Christmas List

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My daughter turned 18 months old this week. This happened fast, and I was not prepared for how quickly dad duties escalated from the mindless tasks of newborn care to the doozies involved in raising this now self-aware mini human.

And here’s the scariest part…the girl won’t start preschool for 3 more years. This means until then, I am her exclusive source of education. It is my job to instill valuable life lessons deep within her impressionable little brain. The more I screw this up, the more likely she is to conjure some imaginary friend who convinces her to go grab a chef’s knife and stand over daddy’s bedside.

What I want most though — next to not raising a sociopath — is for the girl to be happy. I want to pack her childhood with so much fun and fulfillment that when she looks back on it as an adult, she shivers with nostalgia. As a parent, it’s my responsibility to manufacture these positive experiences. And as it turns out, one of the best ways to do this is with family traditions.

What is Tradition?

Tradition is defined as a belief or custom handed down from generation to generation. However, Meg Cox, tradition guru and author of The Book of New Family Traditions, believes that what we typically consider tradition is better referred to as a ritual, and she offers the following definition:

I sometimes use the words ritual and tradition interchangeably, but I prefer the word ritual because it covers more ground. It’s a stretchy word that covers everything from saying grace at the table to big ceremonies. Ritual is something you do in the same way over and over, on purpose. To me, family ritual is practically any activity you purposely repeat together as a family that includes a heightened attentiveness, and something extra that lifts it above the ordinary ruts.

Why Are Rituals Important for Children?

Instills a Sense of Belonging

Rituals promote togetherness, providing kids with a sense of belonging and security, traits that can help them adjust to the next stage in life…

Prepares Kids for College

A 1992 study performed on college students found that kids who grew up with family rituals possessed a stronger sense of identity, a trait that made them feel worthy of being liked and helped them transition to life outside the home.

Provides Security

As a father, you control only so much. A good portion of your child’s wellbeing is up to fate or God or the universe or whatever else you want to pin it on. But while I can’t prevent every boo-boo or violently threaten every playground bully (though I will try), I can provide a safe and supportive environment at home.

Decreases the Chances that Your Kid Turns Out A Screw-up

A study of 90,000 teenagers showed that kids who feel emotionally close to their families are less likely to engage in ‘risky behavior’.

Helps Navigate Change

While rituals have long been used to celebrate graduation, marriage, and many other major life changes, they can also help with transitions in daily routine. Take bedtime for example. My daughter avoids sleep like I avoid an old high school acquaintance I’ve spotted in a grocery store. But after a her bath and bottle and, like, 16 bedtime stories…presto! Right to sleep.

Provides Exclusive Family Time

I’m busy, man. Between work, maintaining the house, and constantly trying (and failing) to stay in shape, I have little time for anything else. Rituals, however, provide exclusive, pre-scheduled family time. And according to child psychiatrist Bruno Bettelheim in his book A Good Enough Parent, regular periods in which a child is the center of attention is essential to his or her psychological development.

Teaches Practical Skills

A less obvious benefit of ritual is that your kid might actually learn something — a bedtime story teaches her to read, while conversing over dinner helps her communicate. If there’s anything the girl can learn without me having to lecture her 30 times, I’m all for it.

Creates Deep Emotional Experiences

Rituals create happy brains. Research shows that rituals stimulate both the left and right brain hemispheres simultaneously, creating deep emotional experiences (picture a shiver down your back). These positive emotions can lead to higher levels of overall happiness.

The 3 Types of Rituals

While rituals come in many shapes and sizes, Meg Cox recommends families establish and practice 3 overarching types:

1. Daily

A ritual doesn’t have to be some major production. Routine-based rituals can help kids navigate their day and include:

• Family dinner
• Bedtime rituals
• Morning rituals
• Before/after school rituals

2. Weekly

One fun family activity per week seems like a safe place between promoting togetherness and driving each other crazy.

• Movie night
• Weekend outing
• Game night
• Homemade pizza night
• Saturday morning breakfast

3. Celebrations of Holidays and Major Milestones

• Holidays
• Birthdays
• Graduations
• Annual vacations
• First and last day of school celebrations

How to Get Started Right Now

Some of my favorite traditions and most cherished memories come from being a kid during the holidays. Was there anything better? I remember our family’s Halloween parties, and Thanksgiving meals, and do you remember Christmas morning? Member!? The Christmas of ‘91 I got a Sega and omfg…16-bit graphics are what kids’ dreams are made of. To a kid, holidays are magic.

But now that I’m all grown up, I realize that was as good as it’s gonna get. You spend a few years dealing with the real world and all of its bullshit and the magic dies. This is why only the kids can hear the bell in The Polar Express…because the adults have had the magic beaten out of them by 40 hour work weeks and mortgage payments.

But since my daughter was born, a funny thing has happened: I’ve started to relive some of that magic vicariously through her. She’s reminded me of importance and awesomeness of childhood family traditions, and she’s the inspiration for this list:

The Big Ass List of Family Traditions

Here is The Millennial Man’s running list of family tradition ideas. We will start with the major holidays, adding new editions and traditions throughout the year.

Fall and Halloween Edition

Thanksgiving Edition

Christmas Edition

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If there’s one piece of advice I’d offer new fathers, it’s to really embrace the family activity. Traditions and rituals are shown to strengthen family bonds, provide children with comfort and security, and are often the source of the longest lasting childhood memories. Not to mention, you might kill each other if you just sit inside all day.

The good news is fall is the perfect time for family bonding. The weather is beautiful, and every hobby farm in the county is running its version of the autumn/Halloween family blowout. But should you need further incentive to get out and enjoy the season, here now, in descending order for dramatic effect, is the big ass list of family traditions, fall and Halloween edition.

30. Rake a Leaf Pile

The best way to dupe the kids into a morning of doing yard work is with the promise of an afternoon spent jumping into a pile of leaves.

29. Wear a Costume

I haven’t dressed up in 7 years, and you know what? I miss it. When I take my daughter out trick-or-treating this year, I will be in costume. That seems like a solid ‘cool dad’ move.

28. Go to a Pumpkin Patch

27. Carve Pumpkins

26. Don’t Carve Pumpkins

I am an awful artist, and trying to detail a pumpkin using a childproof carving knife is likely to test my patience. If you, too, aren’t much for pumpkin carving, here are a few pumpkin decorating alternatives.

25. Bake Halloween Themed Treats

If there’s one thing Halloween needs, it’s more sweets. Here’s a list of some Halloween themed snack ideas.

24. Watch a Scary Movie

I still can’t walk into an unlit room without imagining the girl from The Ring crawling out from a darkened corner. Therefore, I no longer watch scary movies. But in the spirit of the holiday, here are a few terrifying previews I’ve seen…for a few seconds…before scrambling for the remote and promptly turning the channel.

The Babadook

Goodnight Mommy

Sinister

The Conjuring

23. Watch a Scary Movie

Here is a much better list:

Halloweentown

It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown

The Nightmare Before Christmas

Casper

Hocus Pocus

Where does Hocus Pocus rank on the list of greatest holiday movies of all time? Top 10? Top 5? Higher?

22. Build Your Own Haunted House

When I was a kid, my aunt threw Halloween parties and turned her garage into a DIY haunted house. That was a strong Halloween effort.

21. Visit a Haunted House

A few years ago, my girlfriend (now wife) and I attended a ‘haunted basement’ with another couple. It was one of these new age, next level attractions designed for MAXIMUM TERROR.

They forced you to sign a waiver and gave you a safe word that would stop the show in the event that you were about to lose your mind or had shit yourself and were in need of a quick exit through the back door.

This was the last place I wanted to spend my Saturday night, but I manned up and took solace in knowing that the four of us would be together so, really, how scary could it be?

The first thing they did was split us up. Then, alone and afraid, I was ambushed by a zombie-nurse with body odor, strapped to an antique wheelchair, and pushed through some mock insane asylum while she called me ‘crazy fucker’.

It was then when I realized that the type of people who VOLUNTEER to touch strangers in a secluded room of a dark basement are the last type of people I want touching me in a secluded room of a dark basement.

Anyway, I’d stick to the basic, hands-off spookhouse.

20. Walk Through a Corn Maze

19. Visit an Apple Orchard

Wanna know the best kind of apple orchard? One that doubles as a winery. Two weeks ago, I took the day off, packed up my wife and daughter, and we headed to an apple orchard and winery. The girl ate apples and played at the petting zoo, and my wife and I slugged wine. Perfect family outing.

18. Read Spooky Picture Books

Here are the top 3 from Amazon’s list of bestselling children’s Halloween books:

Little Blue Truck’s Halloween

Room on the Broom

The Spooky Wheels on the Bus

17. Trick-or-Treat

I am pumped to take the girl out trick-or-treating this year…and then to taste test the candy to make sure it’s safe.

16. Start a Candy Exchange

The girl has a peanut allergy, which means she can eat about 3% of her trick-or-treating haul and exactly none of the good stuff. I have long wondered how I’m going to make this up to her but have now found my solution: a candy exchange.

Used by parents of kids with diabetes — or just those who don’t want their kids eating 5 pounds of candy — a candy exchange allows the kid to select a few pieces to retain while the rest is set out overnight for some ghoulish version of the Tooth Fairy. The Candy Fairy then leaves a toy in exchange for the candy and whisks the goodies away to a far off destination like my closet, where I can snack on the loot in secrecy until Christmas. Magic!

15. Craft

Remember Blow Pop ghosts? You know, where you wrap a Kleenex around a Blow Pop and use a Sharpie to color ghost eyes and a mouth. That is a quality Halloween craft.

14. Go on a Hayride

13. Drink Hot Apple Cider

12. Light a Candle

Fall scented candles are the best scented candles. We’re about halfway through a ‘Pumpkin Butter’ WoodWick right now and omg does it smell good. I want to light it and drink it’s wax.

Also, scent, more than any other sense, can trigger positive emotions and memories. So using a similarly scented candle every fall can activate Halloween happiness from years past.

11. Play Halloween Music

10. Take a Hike

9. Decorate

My neighbor across the street rocks an immaculate Halloween display. But this year I’m going to outdo him. Poor guy has no idea he’s about to get his ass whooped in a competition he doesn’t even know he has entered.

8. Eat Caramel Apples

7. Roast Pumpkin Seeds

6. Build a Bonfire

5. Tell Scary Stories

4. Bake Apple Crisp

Below is my mom’s apple crisp recipe. This is my absolute favorite fall dessert, likely because it contains 200 calories per square inch.

Ingredients

• 3 cups flour
• 2 teaspoons salt
• 1 teaspoon baking soda
• 1.5 cups shortening
• 1 cup brown sugar
• 2 cups oatmeal
• 5 apples
• 1.5 cups sugar
• 1 teaspoon cinnamon
• 2 tablespoons butter

Instructions

1. Peel and core 5 apples. Then slice.
2. In a Ziplock bag, mix sugar and cinnamon.
3. Add the apples to the bag, shaking to coat. Set the bag aside
4. Combine flour, salt, and baking soda in a mixing bowl and gently mix with a fork.
5. Add the brown sugar and oatmeal to the mixing bowl. Mix gently.
6. Add the shortening to the mixing bowl.
7. Using a pastry cutter, cut ingredients. The final mixture will be grainy.
8. Spray a 9×13 baking pan.
9. Add half the mixing bowl mixture to the pan. Pat lightly.
10. Add the coated apple slices to the pan.
11. Cut the butter into chunks. Place on top of the apples.
12. Add the remaining mixture to the pan.
13. Bake at 350°F for 45 min. – 1 hour.
14. Serve warm and top with ice cream.

3. Play Backyard Football

2. Watch Football

This Sunday I’m gonna make some apps, drink beer, dress the girl in her Vikings jersey, and as a family, we’re gonna watch the Vikings march toward Super Bowl 51. Also, I’m going to count this as a family tradition.

1. Take Pictures

I swear every year passes faster than the last. Last Halloween seems like it was only months ago. The only thing that has really changed is the girl. Last October she was a baby. Now she’s not. Next year she’ll be a mini human. The one thing I don’t want is to forget any of this. And with my trusty dad camera hanging from my neck, I won’t.

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